Friday, January 13, 2012
Do NOT tell me dogs have clean mouths, Mine just ate his own poop
I am so fucking disgusted by my dog, Elvis. DUDE, you have eaten your poop every day for the past three days!!! AGH! I can't even be fast enough to keep him from doing it. well, then he smells like shit, his farts smell like double shit, and his shit smells like triple shit. WTF, you nasty thing!? If he wasn't so damn cute, I would totally tie him up out there the entire day while the sun was still shining (I mean, hey, he likes it anyway). I thought, maybe he is doing it because he is hungry. Probably not. He does it right after he eats. Maybe he is ashamed. Probably so. I am unable to take him for walks when nature calls because of the girls, so I stick him out back on the deck when I am busy, like making lunch or dinner, or putting a girl to a nap... whatever. It sucks, but I have to figure it out. He sure as hell is NOT going to stop eating his poop. The upside is that my dog recycles. hahaha haha ha. oh. my. freakin. lord. Oh, and he has basically stopped going inside, #1 and #2. I am picking up on his signals. Puppies are cute, but they are also the spawn of satan. I would rather be covered in baby shit, and be puked on ten times on my head, than have to deal with dog shit closer than a couple feet. (Love poop scoops) Ah, when life gives us lemons, make lemonade, and yell at the fucking dog.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Photo Test
This is Elvis, our 5 month old bulldog puppy. He thinks he is our third child. And he thinks the lovely princess couch that the girls got for Christmas belongs to him. They get up for a second and he is all over it! Actually, he will try to sit on them or even nudge them off just to lay on it. What a turd.
Bring on the New Year... Boogers, Barf and All!
Today is one of those days where I don't feel like doing crap. I want to be lazy on my couch, eat junk food, and not care what is going on around me. Unfortunately, that will never happen again... ever. Olivia and Farrah Melton have decided that for me. Yes, my 3 and 1 year olds are taking over!
They have been really sick for about a week. I was sick too, but it was a blip on our radar compared to their drooling, runny nose, coughing, sneezing, booger infested selves. They have been troopers, but the night time bouts of coughing uncontrollably, sometimes inducing vomitting, are killing me. I try what I can to minimize this pain for them, but that is all I can do. On the lighter side, when Farrah coughs so bad and pukes, she manages to get it ALL over me. One time she did it 4 times in about 10 seconds. We got naked right there in the dining room and went up to take a bath. Second time she decorated me with puke was when George was home. We had been playing with her, coaxing her to walk, and apparantly got her riled up too much. I was sitting on the floor and she was standing over me on my lap. She projectiled onto my cheek and chin... barely missing my mouth. I will never be able to describe the feeling of having barf roll down your chest between your boobs. um. yah. Thankfully, we were able to take a shower together. It was Farrah's first Mommy baby shower and she loved it. Now let's not do that again!
Even though we have all started this year off utterly sick and disgusting (not to mention George's fever and URI!) I think it is going to be a better than average year. I will be finished with school on January 30th, and I will graduate in April. I cannot wait! I will also begin caring for my friend, Meara's, new baby girl. I am so excited to be helping their family, since she may get night shift, and also, babies (esp. this one) are so amazing!
I find typing this up very therapeutic, but I can't ever force myself to take the time to get on here. I read my friend's blogs, and they appear so easy to do. But they also write much better than I do. I don't expect anyone to want to read this, but it will be nice for me to look back on. I am not even pregnant and I always have foggy brain. haha.
til later.
They have been really sick for about a week. I was sick too, but it was a blip on our radar compared to their drooling, runny nose, coughing, sneezing, booger infested selves. They have been troopers, but the night time bouts of coughing uncontrollably, sometimes inducing vomitting, are killing me. I try what I can to minimize this pain for them, but that is all I can do. On the lighter side, when Farrah coughs so bad and pukes, she manages to get it ALL over me. One time she did it 4 times in about 10 seconds. We got naked right there in the dining room and went up to take a bath. Second time she decorated me with puke was when George was home. We had been playing with her, coaxing her to walk, and apparantly got her riled up too much. I was sitting on the floor and she was standing over me on my lap. She projectiled onto my cheek and chin... barely missing my mouth. I will never be able to describe the feeling of having barf roll down your chest between your boobs. um. yah. Thankfully, we were able to take a shower together. It was Farrah's first Mommy baby shower and she loved it. Now let's not do that again!
Even though we have all started this year off utterly sick and disgusting (not to mention George's fever and URI!) I think it is going to be a better than average year. I will be finished with school on January 30th, and I will graduate in April. I cannot wait! I will also begin caring for my friend, Meara's, new baby girl. I am so excited to be helping their family, since she may get night shift, and also, babies (esp. this one) are so amazing!
I find typing this up very therapeutic, but I can't ever force myself to take the time to get on here. I read my friend's blogs, and they appear so easy to do. But they also write much better than I do. I don't expect anyone to want to read this, but it will be nice for me to look back on. I am not even pregnant and I always have foggy brain. haha.
til later.
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